::extreme John Oliver voice::

CAULIFLOWER RICE.

It can be spectacular, and it can be bad. It’s a useful substitute for rice and flour in some capacities, though, and this recipe highlights exactly that. Plus, it’s easy to make this vegan, and it’s assuredly gluten-free.

Black Bean Burrito Bowls

(serves 4)

Let’s start with the cilantro-lime “rice” base to your bowl. The allium and citrus flavors transform the cauliflower substantially.

4 cups cauliflower rice (though, seriously, y’all, you can just pulse a head of cauliflower through a food processor a couple of times)
6-8 cloves of garlic, minced
1/4 cup cilantro, chopped
1/4 cup green onions, chopped
Juice from 2 limes
Salt and pepper to taste
1 T olive oil

Heat a skillet and add oil. Saute your garlic and cauliflower rice together, and add the cilantro and green onions. Cook for another 5 minutes, adding the lime juice at the end, and seasoning to taste. Set aside.

Now, on to the toppings. This is fun, because there are a million ways to top your cauliflower rice, from beans to roasted squash. In this case, I was too lazy to peel a sweet potato, so I bought butternut squash zoodles from the grocery store, and quick roasted them in the oven.

4 cups of roastable vegetables (from squash to sweet potatoes to mushrooms – whatever you feel like), chopped
1 t paprika
1 t chili powder (you can use a blend, or ancho, or chipotle – whatever you have on hand)
Salt and pepper to taste
1 T olive oil

Toss your ingredients together and place on parchment paper (easier cleanup!) on a cookie sheet/jelly roll pan, and bake at 400 until cooked (the cooking time will largely depend on your vegetable selection).

Now that that’s sorted, let’s move on to the black beans and salsa.

The black beans are super easy. Just drain and rinse a can of black beans (it removes the excess sodium), and simmer with spices.

1 can of black beans, drained and rinsed
2-3 cloves of garlic, minced
1 t paprika
1 t cumin
1 T olive oil

Saute your garlic in olive oil, and add the spices and beans. Stir together and heat through. Boom. Done. So your salsa (or pico)?

It’s okay to cheat here. Take your shortcuts where you can. Not everyone has endless time to prep, and that’s okay. If you feel like making it, here’s what I do:

1 cup, cherry tomatoes
.25 cup, cilantro
.5 jalapeno, seeded
.25 cup red onion, coarsely chopped
Either lime juice or red wine vinegar (to add contrast, and always to taste)
Salt and pepper to taste

Pulse it in the food processor, and you’re done. Easy.

If you want more protein in your diet, you can add pepitas to sour cream and blend until smooth, but let’s assume that like most people, you’re now starving and eagerly awaiting your dinner. Slice up your additions, whether it’s lime wedges, avocado, or jalapeno. Shred a little cheese, or open up some sour cream. Throw on some leftover cilantro or green onions from your rice-making endeavors. It’s adjustable to your likes and dietary needs.

Another thing: you can do your prep in advance over the weekend for almost all of this, which can lead to walking in the door, heating up your rice, beans, and vegetables, and having dinner on the table within 30 minutes.

Spoon your “rice” into a shallow bowl, and layer your toppings in sections. Top as you like, and enjoy!